Wedding Heirlooms and Traditions

One part of being a wedding planner that I love as much as the wedding day is learning from brides their family wedding traditions or seeing beautiful heirlooms that are significant to their family. The No Regrets Events team loves working with brides to come up with creative ways integrate these in a meaningful way into their wedding celebration. But, as with every aspect of planning a wedding, there is certain etiquette that should be followed when it comes to incorporating traditions and heirlooms into the celebration. When including these delightful details in your special day it is important to pay attention to three helpful guidelines:

Etiquette Rule Number One: Ask for Permission

Photograph by Frank Gibson
Photography
A very special No Regrets Events Bride!

A recent No Regrets Events bride wore a beautiful gown that had been worn by not only her grandmother and mother, but by other family members, and had significant meaning to each of them. After several weddings and years of storage the dress was in need of repair and a good cleaning. The loving and patient hands of the talented Chris Hudson brought the dress back to practically the state it was the day her grandmother walked down the aisle more than 50 years earlier. Throughout the cleaning and repairing process the bride and her mother consulted with the previous wearers and were very conscious of the family members desire not to see the dress altered in ways other than properly fitting the bride. The key etiquette here is to ask for permission. For those of you who have seen the movie 27 Dresses, you are familiar with that gut-wrenching scene where Katherine Heigl’s clueless sister totally reworks their deceased mother’s wedding dress to the point where it is unrecognizable without ever having asked her older sister’s feelings on the matter. Weddings are a beautiful time but they can also be a sensitive time – this is a good time to be especially careful of your family and loved ones feelings (and vice versa). So the bottom line in etiquette when incorporating family treasures is to be considerate and ask for permission.

Etiquette Rule Number Two: Keep It Safe

Photography By McGinnis Leathers
The handbag was carried by the bride’s grandmother on her wedding day

This piece of advice isn’t as much about etiquette but is equally, if not more important – guard these treasures. If you don’t have a No Regrets Events wedding planner to protect these priceless pieces, then find a trustworthy friend or family member who is assigned to the particular item and have them guard it with their life. Chances are this heirloom is very special to you or someone else and that someone else will want it back the way you found it. So make like a Girl Scout and leave that camp site better than you found it if you catch my drift.

Etiquette Rule Number Three: Be Creative
The No Regrets Events team loves the various heirlooms brides incorporate into their wedding. The jewelry we have seen over the years has been amazing, hankies are favorites, beautiful family veils, and even special family Bibles are some of the special things we have seen.

Photography By Rafterman Photography
This broach has been passed down for several generations and was carried by the bride’s mother on her wedding day

However, not everyone has family jewels or Scottish kilts to pass down so get creative. Maybe you could read a passage that was read at your grandparents wedding or mimic the style of your parents wedding invitation on your own.

Things like this aren’t necessarily family heirlooms but could be your way of creating a special wedding tradition, and a way to honor

special people in your lives. Maybe you and your fiancée decide to create your own tradition. Be certain to document the details through photographs and in writing so you can share the tradition with future generations. The most important thing is that you are creating a beautiful reminder of what this day is truly about – a lifelong commitment to loving one another.

Whether you’re having a funky, modern, vintage, or formal wedding, integrating a family tradition or heirloom is a wonderful way to make a special day even more memorable. Just remember to ask permission, keep it safe and be creative.